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Thanks for saying hi! Funny stuff here! You might like my "Today's Winners" series. Violet
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4/22/2011 3:13 am |
hi I got this email last night. "you want some american cock right now? email me ,I'm ready to give you the fucking of your life " what is "the fucking of your life" mean anyway???
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4/26/2011 10:14 am |
i got this email. should I report?? "i will pay you to lick your pussy angel "
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It is great to see that humor is still alive.
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I perused the profile of a guy who had written to me, noted that he said he was a smoker, and replied to him that sorry, smoking is a deal-breaker. He replied, "-no i m not a smoker i would have one if someone offered me one in a bar but i dont smoke ...i hope that clarifies it ...i hate cig smoke too -- " Way to backpedal!
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i am sorry jn. i don't understand this post. my englis is not so good. i want to know this site of porn for women you talk on my blog. please. s_o_m
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The only 'contribution' I've had recently was the classic "Wanna F*ck?" with two blank profile 'pics' attached. WTF was THAT about? About a year ago or so I got this lovely offer and I'll tell ya the response as well: Him: Classy, refined guy looking to service older sexually unfulfilled women, I charge $100/hr and I am worth it. Will meet anywhere and do anything you ask, love to eat pussy until you squirt, can go all night. This is for real. Me: Hmm. I'm afraid I'm too poor to meet your requirements, however I do have twenty-five cents that I'm not using. May I pay you THAT to watch you walk past? Next time, read the profile twerp.
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awesome post!!!!... well done and heaps funny!!!. "Eight past midnight.....63 miles to venus." myblog ..............
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7/19/2011 8:39 pm |
JN... that was a hoot, reading all those and laughing.. thanks for that endorphin rush... *wiping the tears from my eyes*... GREAT POST!!! Elle
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I'm always worried if I am writing or responding in the wrong way but after looking at the above I feel somewhat relieved. Wow, quite a collection from some illiterate chumps with the social graces of a rutting male baboon hopped up on viagra and tequila.
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Here's a twist on this,and there is a point to it. 1st~ I try to match what I say to the handle/header,and the profile pop-up. I'll give one example I send on the IMC,If I sent it to you/JPN it would be instantly on top of your list.But since I chat with all ages on the IMC,this goes to those that fit these profiles~college/school girls.This is what I send~"Do U ever think he peeks?".Most times I don't get replies.Some replies are rather nawty~her bro,dad,etc does peek. BUT,and this is the point I want to make and Is the basis for the question.I've had a few very long chats with young ladies that don't watch out for their surroundings.They tell me they've never thought about the reality of being stalked.And I share tips and pointers on what and where to watch out for clues.Of the chats that have resulted by me sending this out,I've made a few 'chat buddies'. And an unexpected return~TWO girls have contacted me back saying thanks that our chats had prevented what would have been horrible news headlines. So~JPN,,,Do U ever think he peeks? ~~~~~ >>>I can't get to your bling~will you gift me one of the 'Wanted/Ryan's group' you have now,please. RTPersonals Parody Of a Real Sex Site
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8/31/2011 5:38 am |
I have not laughed that hard in the morning in a long time. Thank you every so much. I would thank the illiterate hordes as well but as you've said they'll probably never read it.
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I found RTPersonals to be great for meeting people who wanted to try different things they have never tried before. ive met 2 great sexual partners one for life and one for fun gentlekiss5 and now i mostly go into the chat rooms to help the newbies get started on exploring their fantasies in a agread by both parties way ty for the blog guest sign up
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hahahaha those are great lmao some people socail skills are absolutly amazing thx for the chuckel and list of what not to say lol take care
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1 post 9/3/2011 3:54 pm |
Aye thats sad guys like that will no tact or class make it difficult for decent guys like me. ( i call myself decent, as i have a pic of my cock on display lol. )
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But not all the time.
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Very Interesting!!
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Damn that was funny. Some people have no clue and no manners.
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10/31/2011 6:21 am |
OMG I just copy and past Bravo Frexxxxxxxxxxx
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Those messages are hilarious, yet sad. It's no wonder I've lost faith in humanity.
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Hilarious. Thank You. "Rules for happiness: something to do, someone to love, something to hope for.”― Immanuel Kant .
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JN!!! I LOVE IT!!! I have to take the time to go through all of these. I hope you don't mind, but if anyone wants to see some others they can feel free to visit my blogs as well... #1...Best Complimentary Emails wupdates #2...Emailslame, boring, or just plain stupidwupdates #3...A polite No Thank You can cause thiswupdates #4...Unsolicited HATE Emails no prior contactwupdates I basically posted them so men and women both could see what goes on here, and what they are up against when they send out messages and are NOT getting responses. NOT EVERYONE on here is clueless, but for some reason the tag of "sex site" seems to make many think that rules, protocols, and MANNERS let alone RESPECT go out the door. It is no one's personal 'fault' they get slammed with certain messages, but it sure is nice to see that you are not the only one getting them, nor that you are being ignored because you somehow just failed or are a reject. There ARE things like these types of emails playing against you out there. GOOD JOB JN!!
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JN...lol I have to say in the last 2 weeks I have had more emails with THIS bullsh*t than I can tell.... at least 5 or 6 of them... CONTENT: I saw your profile, it caught my eye. Something in your smile said I just had to contact you. We have so much in common and your profile makes you sound so interesting. Please contact me so I can find out more about you. I AM LAUGHING because my profile AND the photo both say clearly *I AM NOT AVAILABLE.. DO NOT CONTACT ME FOR MEETINGS OR DATES*. HOW... can we have so much in common?? WHAT could have possibly caught your eye?? ALL..bullsh*t sent to how many women?? As if they think we are all so stupid and insecure that we fall for that crap?? I mean.. come on.. had my profile even SAID something other than I am not available it MAY have been believable. Seriously.. is this the 'new' approach thing?
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Marvellous work JN! I must be a good deal more patient that you. Our profile states quite clearly who and what we want and still get single guys trying their luck. Keep it up, you won't stop them but at least you're striking back
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(Being snarky)... Don't you know??? We are 'man haters' because I am doing the SAME thing and so are you, that an undisclosed number of people are doing by posting the 'clueless idiots' like this. (sarcasm totally here) The way I see it, if you are going to ACT like this TO us then everyone should KNOW IT. I don't think it is man hating or a crusade or any other name someone cares to give it, it is stating that 'this person that wrote this is like this' and being made to be responisble for their own jacka**ness... is that a word?? lol I LOVE MEN, but I had a**holes and dicks. I don't think even in a bonafide whorehouse some of these creatures would act as bad as they do in here. They do it because they are anonymous and behind a computer..and it shows what they REALLY are like. Bravo JN!!!
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JN... I DOOOO!!! I have had many MANY compliments on helping out, I wrote a blog for those as well. I definitely want to commend and give credit to the GREAT men that DO exist here. Some really do enjoy some directions, a map so to speak, of how things work. high 5 hun! xoxox
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8/7/2012 3:59 am |
I just came across your postings - truely hilarious! Had me laughing all night!! Many thanks for the humor!!
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1 post 8/18/2012 9:00 am |
Great entertainment...
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Had to share.. yeah.. right... I just got this message from a married man whining he can't get any at home and this is the message IN FULL... MSG: U want to suck this cock don't u Yeah, that just makes me want to run out and....... tell his wife actually!! Thinking this is not going to work well at all. Probably why his wife isn't doing him either. NOT a good 'first contact' message to send at all.
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If you wouldn't say this shit to someone in person, then you shouldn't say this shit to someone online.
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Here ya go JN... one you will love. This was posted in my blog and I thought I would share it over here. The person that received it clearly is here just to be an exhibitionist and be on cam only. MSG: Ok you want nothing so I see you're a cam girl so why are you here looking for clients? You should get the fuck off this site it's fuck buddy mobile not cam whore site people here are looking for a real fuck not a cam to jerk off to fuck youporn is free so I think you should take your rude player ass off or I will see if you fall under the scamers rules and get you removed you say you don't want pictures ect... so fucking leave you ignorant asshole I laughed my butt off!! I am sure many that receive these do not. She is not looking for 'clients', in fact she states she is not here to meet anyone. So many are here ON cam, apparently his little feelings were hurt because he couldn't meet and f*ck her. So many guys get here and when they don't get instant sex they automatically think scam or fake when guess what, maybe they just don't want to meet YOU!!! I agree.."If you wouldn't say this shit to someone in person, then you shouldn't say this shit to someone online".
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I did ask her, she said he was removed from the site (his profile was down and not said 'system has removed') for a few hours. He obviously then called in or something and is back online. The part I dislike about this is I have heard other people getting kicked off and them taking days to get their profiles back. No set criteria for this it seems. I certainly do not think people that write this crap should be allowed on here at all.
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Okay, maybe it is just me, but I am thinking NOT. I get this yesterday...never saw this man before, don't know him, I am sure this was because we were 'close'. Should I point out I have many men living on my street, they are 'close', but I don't f*ck them!! Subject: Us (a photo is attached) Message: Care for some company sweetie?? Xxx He is 61, totally fat and gross, his profile (yeah I hate to post this but...) says 9 inches on the profile and I swear that thing wasn't even 4 in the attached photo... did I say totally fat???... and he thinks I am just going to let a TOTAL STRANGER into my home for some 'company' as if I don't know he wants to f*ck me.... riiiiiight. I wouldn't let ANY 'total stranger' in my home, let alone someone sending me a dick photo and totally ignoring that I specifically say "DO NOT contact me for meetings or dates". He could be a , a thief, or worse. I wouldn't take that chance as I said with ANYONE, let alone from here. Just sayin......
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I guess above and beyond not reading, I just cannot see someone thinking I would let a TOTAL STRANGER into my home, especially one from a sex site. I am sure there are those that do this, but to my HOME??? For a FIRST meeting??? A woman in Florida was beaten and as she let at guy from POF come to her home for the first meeting. H*ll, I wouldn't do it for the first FEW meets, not until I felt comfortable. . Keep in mind, that it wasn't just to come to my home, he sent a totally naked photo with this message so he obviously thought he was gonna get some nookie.... from a TOTAL STRANGER???? NOT happening in this woman's life.
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I had to share this...THIS IS JUST PLAIN STUPID... DON'T DO THIS... SERIOUSLY...I say this because you REALLY look like a jacka** when you do this. I got this first message and it was lame as he 'read' my profile and of course... MSG: Was going through when i saw your profile will love to know more about you. Yeah, that same freaking jerky line that you would 'love to know more about me' when it clearly says 'I AM NOT AVAILABLE!' So we KNOW he didn't read. YET.... my autoreply went out to him. It starts with "MY PROFILE CLEARLY STATES NOT AVAILABLE SO I HOPE YOU DID NOT EMAIL ME ASKING FOR A DATE OR TO BE FRIENDS." Okay... this is how STUPID this jack*ass is/was... he then sent THIS message... MSG 2: Everything about you and mostly what a pretty woman like yourself is doing and looking for on here..send me answers to my mail box as (insert addy here) am new here and not always online. Um... you STILL ignore what I wrote and you think THIS is attractive??? I am thinking what an a**hole.... This is NOT a good approach. Obviously I am not 'looking' for anything and my profile IS clear.
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Well it isn't an 'aggravation' to me, I laugh at the stupidity of this actually. I do not turn my filters or cupid settings on to tune out anyone because I DO get tons of people that are great people and/or newbies that want to know how the site works, possibly information on the blogs and things, or they want help with their profiles. I LOVE helping out. It definitely outweighs the occassional horny, egotistical jerk that thinks 'not available' doesn't apply to them. lol I wouldn't miss helping out anyone, it is very rewarding to me. It took me about 2 months from the last one I posted for you.
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1 post 5/5/2013 7:12 pm |
Sorry just reading all the one liners, really cracks me up, especially the "what's up" dude. where do these guys fall out from?
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10/18/2013 2:02 am |
the brain trust has relocated, and it's here. haha
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I got "Are you by any chance a Buddhist priest?" the other day. *[blog charleyb223]*
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JN, I noticed that there is a sudden SURGE of the 18 and 19 year olds this week. You can tell it is holiday break and they all seem to think they are just going to log in and get all you can handle p*ssy for Christmas/New Years. ROFLMAO. I am laughing so hard at their profiles and emails. They seem to think they have ALL THAT and are so GREAT in bed based on they are 18 and can go go go. I hate to tell them, that it is over that quick quick quick too!! LOL They start early with the ego for f*cking obviously. high 5 Great post.
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Omfg.. I am laughing so hard this morning. I Just had to share it with you JN. I can't believe I woke up to THIS. This guy started out with LIE saying I sent him a message that I never sent, and then proceeded to have an entire conversation with himself. He sent MULTIPLE messages within seconds of each one as if I was just sitting here waiting for the magic words to answer. Trust me.. I AM NOT sitting here waiting to answer messages or anything. NO ONE IS!!... Here it is folks.. 1st msg 9:20am: I was laughing at you when you left me a email about woman (He then received my auto reply) 2nd msg 9:20am: hun 3rd msg 9:21am: I have no problem with woman and one this sight woman know I'm very private and I tell them don't post any thing about me 4th msg 9:21am: So they Dont 5th msg 9:22am: And yes it's alot of woman that friend me but I dont 6th msg 9:23am: Only 3 our 4 that I know that want post any thing 7th msg 9:23am: So miss lady you have a Bless day
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It is amazing. Thank you all for the laughs. Not sure how men think the lines are really going to work, but they must have some time or another.
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Your blog was recommended for this one. Totally SHIT that dudes say. I saw this and just about couldn’t breathe. Please note that I am here for Exhibitionism ONLY, not to meet and my profile says it over and over..rofl. This man is from another state, approx. 100 + miles away from me. This is his FIRST email to me (obviously his last), and his profile….not that it matters, this is wrong for ANY age, but this jerk was 29. PROFILE: I am a over the road truck driver and look for a good time and trying to find my soulmate MSG: I will be in Orion Michigan tomorrow. Let’s meet up and fuck YOU SERIOUSLY THINK I WOULD MEET A TOTAL STRANGER DRIVING THROUGH MY STATE AND ACTUALLY LET HIM USE MY VAGINA AS A TRUCK STOP FOR HIS PENIS???? WTF!!!! I am not even close to Orion, let alone this is beyond DANGEROUS. This guy could be ANYONE and to think that people actually behave this way and participate. I have visions of kidnapping, being sexually attacked, even just catching some venereal disease from a total stranger and he claims he is looking for his soul mate?? NO FREAKING WAY am I this STUPID!!! Bad move guys. The only credit I give this loser is he did not send a photo of his penis with this crap. Turn on your tv and watch the news folks. Women ARE being grabbed and DO turn up missing. No prior contact AT ALL and he wants a meet in less than 24 hours to fuck. SOOOOO not happening.
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I wish I could contribute with something, too bad most shit men say to me is in Spanish (or French). It's mostly the same, which proves that men are IDIOTS, no matter their nationality/language!!! I LOVE your blog, keep up the good work! Kisses from Mexico {=}.
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I couldn't get to your blog fast enough with this one. I cannot believe I actually got this: Main Entry: ex·hi·bi·tion·ism Pronunciation: \-ˈbi-shə-ˌni-zəm\ Function: noun Date: 1893 1 a : a perversion in which sexual gratification is obtained from the indecent exposure of one's genitals (as to a stranger) b : an act of such exposure 2 : the act or practice of behaving so as to attract attention to oneself Just what did you expect from this site? Your definition is wrong. It is not a fantasy but an act. I did NOT give the wrong definition of Exhibitionism, my NAME is Fantasy, not an act I am looking for. If he seriously thought he was going to get me to fuck him with this shit he was deathly WRONG. Blocked/deleted with all the other assholes that think they have some way to force women to fuck them.
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Hi, J. Oh, reading over this mess and the resultant laughter was well worth the time. I've received similar shit from both chicks and some fucked-up guys, I wrote blog posts on it years ago. Neverending "fun". Anyway, when you gonna drop everything, jump on a plane, get naked with me for a weekend, then go home? It's only 6000 miles, c'mon. Si Vis Pacem Para Bellum Audentes Fortuna Iuvat Politicians. Lampposts. Assembly Required.
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I finally have an entry!!!!!! From a 48 year old!!! "I love that as I suck my dick right now and love her hand all through my body in town and get some KY jelly Bangerz shit my asshole and teach me how to suck dickyou can text me at 302 xxx-xxxx I need it bad"
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Oh this is priceless today!! He didn't want to come off disrespectful, but he had to be disrespectful. I doubt HIGHLY that anyone would walk up to a total stranger in person and blurt this out and NOT expect to be leveled to the floor with a punch to the face. EMAIL: I am not sure how to say this and I don't want to come across disrespectful, so I will just blurt it out. I really need a bj we can do more if you want. Are you open to that?
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I have this shit to share! I was browsing through a guy's pictures of him fucking (no protection in sight) at least 5 different ladies and I posted this comment on one of his pictures: "No condoms at all, huh? Good luck with that". Needless to say, he removed my comment and sent me this message: "You can keep your rude commits to yourself and I'm sorry that you mess with nasty guys that have to use a condom. [] " He's 38 years old... Hopefully his junk is so infested with disease he won't be able to breed. Guys like that shouldn't be allowed to!
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I love this hahaha
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8/21/2017 10:38 pm |
I'm a slut just like you and I want to fuck you we can say our goodbyes after one night or we can be fuck buddies it's up to you
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The most hurtful lately...from EX-popular blogger...I was told, "It wasnt gonna be a date!! you're just a rubber to me" Yep...after about 12 years of RTPersonals friendship...we tried to meet, didnt work out... If he fucks like he blogs....Im glad he "Couldnt find a place to park". He's toxic anyways, angry at the world
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I have this shit to share! I was browsing through a guy's pictures of him fucking (no protection in sight) at least 5 different ladies and I posted this comment on one of his pictures: "No condoms at all, huh? Good luck with that". Needless to say, he removed my comment and sent me this message: "You can keep your rude commits to yourself and I'm sorry that you mess with nasty guys that have to use a condom. [] " He's 38 years old... Hopefully his junk is so infested with disease he won't be able to breed. Guys like that shouldn't be allowed to!
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I thought ,a very special man and I were to meet for a DATE,,,after 10-12 years online...I had to cancel or something fell through. I apologized for messing the "date" up.... he crushed me. his answer: "You never were a date, just a rubber " Im still sick over the insult, the ending of my "love" for his character, or his character is all an illusion.... if he says things like that to women that care for him...imagine what he'd do if he were mad!!!
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Okay, I haven't had one like this in a LONG while, so.. it is a tiny conversation I didn't want to have. This is what happens when someone is POLITE to others and the 'shit they say' in return for it. NOT everyone does this, but it happens so much that it is one of the biggest reasons why women don't answer emails. Here ya go: IDIOT i hope I can watch......thank you 3/25/2018 10:08 am Me Whenever I am on cam a cam icon will appear. Just click on that. Hotlist me so you can see when I am online. I do NOT need nor want to talk to you.. no permission is necessary as the cam is open for all. 3/25/2018 10:22 am IDIOT thank you...my name is Dan what is yours 3/25/2018 10:38 am Me DAN.. STOP EMAILING ME!! I ANSWERED YOU TO BE POLITE. MY PROFILE IS CLEAR AND BEING POLITE TO YOU DOESN'T MEAN I AM CHANGING MY MIND. NO LET'S CHAT IS THE FIRST FUCKING LINE... THEN NO LET'S MEET AND NO LET'S BE FRIENDS!! CAN YOU FUCKING RESPECT THAT??? I WROTE IN THE PROFILE I SOUND ANGRY BECAUSE MEN KEEP IGNORING MY PROFILE.. STOP FUCKING IGNORING IT BEFORE I BLOCK YOU ASS.... 3/25/2018 10:49 am IDIOT go ahead and block.....I was NOT going to ask anything else. was just telling you my name. bye 3/25/2018 11:13 am (he stopped) Now, the problem here is.. WHY DID I NEED TO KNOW HIS NAME? I surely wasn't going to tell him mine. I wasn't going to talk to him and I said up front I do not need NOR WANT to talk to him. So quick... tell her your name just in case??? WTF??? I know this is a simple thing not on a scale of what we usually get, but I just wanted to share it JPN. TY.
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Holy crap... How did I miss this? I've got some catching up to do... And I'm always wondering what to do when I'm on a long trip on the subway... Lol ok then... ... is there another way to look at it Going Too Fucking Far NEW Blog Features RevealeD O O A Foolproof Method Posted Over on that NEW site O O
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9/10/2019 7:30 am |
Wow
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1 / 2 staff waggin' Wednesday bloggers welcum? I button down. U button bak.
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None of them can actually get their shit together
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Ahhh don't we all miss these messages??? (NOT) MSG: Hello I am here for vacation xxx-xxx-xxxx for adult fun Profile - blank Photo - none Yeah.. I will get right on that one.. NOT!! lol I guess he thought this was some sluts -r- us drive through and he merely needed to tell me he was in town and ordered up some sex?? LOL Only a fool would answer this OR write this.
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HAHAHA I can't resist, I have to post this one myself. Do NOT write a profile like this... PROFILE: dont keep a good old soul waiting too long u might lose the chance at a real good romance of a night cause im a very rare and perfect being. and this alpha wolf is hungey for beautiful women every where howwwwwwllllllllllllllllll Yeah.. he is so full of himself.
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I haven't stopped laughing at this yet. I can't tell you how many times I have just simply asked a guy that says "Hello" and nothing else, why are they contacting me. Usually I just get ignored, but this 62 year old man in another state and I had this small conversation and as it is a lame/boring/just plain stupid set of messages I had to add it here. This is how it went down... HIM: good morning 10/24/2021 5:34 am ME: thank you, it is a wonderful morning. 10/24/2021 9:16 am HIM: a little frosty up here in toledo,ohio 10/24/2021 9:22 am ME: I am farther north than you in another state!! I am happy to say me and my man keep each other warm so I am okay with it. (I said this just in case he had not noticed my location. MANY guys don't watch that and contact women 100's of limes away.) 10/24/2021 10:04 am HIM: thats good 10/24/2021 10:47 am ME: It certainly isn't bad, that is a dumb statement. May I ask, why are you contacting me? Did you just wish to chat?? I am a bit confused. 10/24/2021 11:26 am HIM: its a dating site 10/24/2021 11:41 am THEN HE BLOCKED ME!!! ROFLMAO I mean, seriously??? I can't stop laughing.....
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I thought ,a very special man and I were to meet for a DATE,,,after 10-12 years online...I had to cancel or something fell through. I apologized for messing the "date" up.... he crushed me. his answer: "You never were a date, just a rubber " Im still sick over the insult, the ending of my "love" for his character, or his character is all an illusion.... if he says things like that to women that care for him...imagine what he'd do if he were mad!!!
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