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Nantucket 8/4/2017
There once was a man from nantucket his dick was so long he
could suck it he smiled with a grin as he wiped off his chin
if his ear was a cunt he would fuck it
0 Comments, 19 Views,
3 Votes
,4.41 Score |
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Joseph 8/2/2017
Hear about the representative that called home, worst
day to come home to talk.
0 Comments, 31 Views,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score |
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bear. and rabbit 7/29/2017
Bear and rabbit are shitting in the woods , , bear ask rabbit..
do you have aproblem with shit sticking to your fur?.. rabbit
says no... bear wipes his ads with rabbit
0 Comments, 35 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score |
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Better Insurance 7/29/2017
A student in medical school wants to specialize in sexual
disorders, so he makes arrangements to visit the sexual
disorder clinic. The chief doctor is showing him around,
discussing cases and the facility, when the student sees
a patient masturbating in the hallway. "What condition
does he have?" the student asks. "He suffers
from Seminal Build-up Disorder, " the doctor replies. "If he doesn't ...
0 Comments, 79 Views,
8 Votes
,4.17 Score |
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Light Beer 7/28/2017
You know why they say light beer is like sex on the beach?
They're both fuckin close to water!
1 Comments, 5 Views,
2 Votes
,4.50 Score |
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O'brian. 7/28/2017
A traveler walks into a bar in Dublin after a long day to finally
have his first Irish beer. The bartender kindly asks, "What'll
ya have boyo?" to which the traveler responds, "A
pint of guiness, sir." The bartender pulls him a perfect
pint and the traveler stares at it in amazement as it settles.
"Ah, that's a mighty fine pull isn't it boyo?"
The bartender asks. "It's beautiful."
Says ...
1 Comments, 78 Views,
3 Votes
,4.90 Score |
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the bar 7/27/2017
This man sits next to this lady in a bar and says "I sure
would like a little pussy" The lady reply's "me too mines as big as a hat"
3 Comments, 49 Views,
13 Votes
,4.65 Score |
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What's the definition for a Vagina 7/25/2017
What's the definition for a Vagina? The box a Penis comes in ...
0 Comments, 12 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score |
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weight problem 7/24/2017
i dated a girl with weight problem in high school. in the
dark of the backseat she would cry out....WAIT WAIT WAIT
1 Comments, 56 Views,
3 Votes
,5.39 Score |
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Funny joke 7/22/2017
What do you call a fish with no i. FSSSSSSSH...
0 Comments, 7 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score |
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Humor is a key component of all successful relationships 7/17/2017
Personally, among all the attirbutes important for a long
term successful relationship.. having a healthy viable
good sense of humor is a must. Its a key link to great cross communications. If you cant
laugh together ( whether its innocent or dark humor) - yo
urelationship will eventually stall. What is your thoughts on the matter? What has been your expereince?
Michaelamour493
0 Comments, 12 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score |
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The Funeral 7/17/2017
At a funeral a priest was giving the last rights to a woman
who had 17 . Her first husband Edward, fathered
6, her second husband Tom fathered 5 and her present husband
George standing at her grave, fathered an additional 6.
As the Priest was wrapping up his solemn and inspirational
comments about her sacrifice and complete love for all
her …He closed with…"She has now been
called by the ...
1 Comments, 123 Views,
11 Votes
,4.66 Score |
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Leroy! 7/14/2017
A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed
by 15 .
'WOW, ' the social worker exclaims, 'are
they all yours?"
'Yep, they are all mine, ' the flustered momma
sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before.
She says, 'Sit down Leroy'. All the rush
to find seats.
'Well, ' says the social worker, 'then you
must be here to sign up. I'll need ...
4 Comments, 120 Views,
12 Votes
,4.92 Score |
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jokes are good 7/11/2017
A joke is a display of humour in which words are used within
a specific and well-defined narrative structure to make
people laugh. It takes the form of a story, usually with
dialogue, and ends in a punch line. It is in the punch line
that the audience becomes aware that the story contains
a second, conflicting meaning. This can be done using a
pun or other word play such as irony, a logical ...
1 Comments, 23 Views,
6 Votes
,2.51 Score |
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A LIMERICK 7/10/2017
There was a young man from Kent,
Whose tool was decidedly bent,
To save himself trouble,
He put it in double,
And instead of coming he went!
1 Comments, 29 Views,
5 Votes
,2.16 Score |
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A SINGH IS A KING ALWAYS 7/7/2017
A muslim friend asked his Sardar friend, when is his Birthday.
He replied next week. The muslim guy said I will love to gift
you curtains so that when make sex with your wife, your windows
have curtains so that neighbors can't watch what you
do. The Singh than asked, when is your birthday, next month
replied his muslim friend, why he asked? The Singh replied
I will love to gift you a ...
0 Comments, 77 Views,
4 Votes
,1.30 Score |
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Which of my friend 7/6/2017
The sailor came home from a secret two year mission only
to find his wife with a new born baby. Furious, he was determined
to track down the father to extract revenge.
"Was it my friend Sam", he demanded.
"No !" his weeping wife replied.
"Was it my friend Jim then?" he asked.
"NO !!!" she said even more upset.
"Well which one of my no good friends did ...
2 Comments, 115 Views,
13 Votes
,3.98 Score |
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opssssssssssss 7/3/2017
happym;
0 Comments, 8 Views,
4 Votes
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The Reunion 7/2/2017
Husband takes the wife to her high school reunion.
After meeting several of her friends and former schoolmates,
they are sitting at a table where he is yawning and overly
bored. The band cranks up and people are beginning to dance.
There's a guy on the dance floor living it large, break
dancing, moon walking, back flips, buying drinks for people,
the works.
Wife turns ...
1 Comments, 142 Views,
20 Votes
,4.78 Score |
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fuck 7/2/2017
i hotel first fuck friend but not have comdom
1 Comments, 54 Views,
11 Votes
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Quick jokes 7/1/2017
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A. A carrot
What's brown and sticky?
A. A stick
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A. A fsh
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
A. To get to the other slide.
1 Comments, 36 Views,
10 Votes
,2.99 Score |
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Can Cold Water Clean Dishes? 6/29/2017
John went to visit his 90-year-old grandfather in a very
secluded, rural area of Saskatchewan. After spending a great evening chatting the night away,
the next morning John’s grandfather prepared breakfast
of bacon, eggs and toast. However, John noticed a film like substance on his plate,
and questioned his grandfather asking, “Are these plates
clean?” His grandfather replied, ...
1 Comments, 104 Views,
10 Votes
,2.99 Score |
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Hail Damage 6/23/2017
A Blonde got caught in a severe thunderstorm. Soon it began
hailing heavily. Her car had dents all over it so she took
it to a body shop.
The owner met her at the door and she explained what happened.
He looked out and saw the damage and decided to have some
fun with her. “Let me tell you a little secret that will
save you a lot of money. Blow in the tailpipe and the dents
will ...
3 Comments, 160 Views,
27 Votes
,5.03 Score |
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The actor & the agent 6/22/2017
An aspiring European actor visits an American agent for
representation. The agent tests him & tells him he has potential.
"What's your name?" " Penis Von Lesbian the actor replies. Agent "You will have to change that if you are to have
a chance at stardom" Actor "Oh No!! I can't do that . My name is an ancient
& honoured name in my country." Agent " I cannot be your agent then. ...
3 Comments, 148 Views,
18 Votes
,5.17 Score |
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That's crazy 6/12/2017
There are these two lunatics in an insane asylum and they
decide to leave so they slip out one night at lights out,
climb up to the roof and they see the lights of the city off
in the distance glittering like diamonds, like all that
joy and freedom is just waiting for them. They're up
about four stories but across a narrow gap they can get to
another roof. One of them makes the run and jumps and ...
3 Comments, 144 Views,
11 Votes
,3.73 Score |
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A Dwarf 6/2/2017
Listen to this, I was coming home from work tired as heck, it
was like 99 degrees sweat in my eyes, and knocked the shit out
of the car stopped in front of me. To tired to move I just sat there. In a minute the door opened
on the other car..And I couldn't believe it, a little
dwarf midget got out, had both hands on his hips..he walked right up to
my window.. And said I'm not HAPPY... I snickered ...
1 Comments, 122 Views,
16 Votes
,4.60 Score |
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whale 6/1/2017
what did one whale say to another whale.....
go home frank ur drunk
2 Comments, 41 Views,
4 Votes
,2.08 Score |
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ceiling fan 5/30/2017
what noise does a ceilng fan make.....
whoooo go ceiling ur number 1 yeah go ceiling....
2 Comments, 25 Views,
7 Votes
,1.00 Score |
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...irony of a blowjob... 5/30/2017
...even if you have her on her knees in front of you...she
still "has" you on your balls....
2 Comments, 41 Views,
9 Votes
,2.78 Score |
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Life in a retirement village! 5/25/2017
On her first day at the senior complex, the new manager addressed
all the seniors pointing out some of her rules: "The female sleeping quarters will be out-of-bounds
for all males, and the male dormitory to the females. Anybody
caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time."
She continued, "Anybody caught breaking this rule
the second time will be fined $60. Being caught a ...
1 Comments, 168 Views,
19 Votes
,5.10 Score |